My Almost Summer

I was just going through old posts where I was so excited for spring and summer. I had this idea of what everything would look like after the countdown ended:

We’d get bikes and ride all around town with the wind blowing through my hair and the sun settling on our skin. We’d stop at little coffee shops along the way, laughing as we dismounted our bikes to join hands and sip our iced coffee on the patio (because he always let me choose the patio).

We’d go for a run along the riverfront after I’d get home from work and spend our evenings grilling out and sipping red wine by the bonfire just like we always said we would…

He’d teach me how to mow the grass and we’d plant vegetables in a garden box he’d help me make. Walking hand in hand, past “our spot”, into Trader Joe’s on Sunday afternoon, we’d collect the beginnings of what would turn out to be a creative, healthy, and ingenious recipe. We’d have our country friends over for long weekends of grilling out and church-going and late nights of board games and laughter.

We’d spend the mornings on my days off drinking french-pressed coffee (that he always made), sitting side by side as we each read our own book in the silence of a new day. I’d lay my head on his lap, so comfortable and settled, as he’d pray (just like he always did) with a hungry, humble heart over our “list”, thanking God for His faithfulness, and asking for more of Him. And just like I always felt after he’d pray, I’d feel my heart quieted and at peace…

I miss that summer.

So now you’re gone and I’m haunted
And I bet you are just fine
Did I make it that easy to walk
Right in and out of my life?


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