I caught myself off guard today thinking, “I’m happier NOW than I was a year ago…” which is surprising because a year ago I couldn’t imagine being happier…and two months ago I couldn’t imagine being happier.
And it’s not something conjured up, not something provoked or dependent on what I can or cannot see; it’s real, this deep-settled peace that I’m just starting to discover in a new way.
I’ll look back on this season and know that these were the days that I found myself.
Where I found my strengths, my weakness, and the powerful freedom that comes from being honest with your own heart.
This is the season where I encountered the FATHER-heart of God in a real, rescuing, and safe kind of way. These were the days that I was intimately acquainted with compassion, tenderhearted kindness, relentless desire and leadership, pure delight and adoration, and the most unimaginable measure of freedom to just BE.
Freedom to unabashedly embrace and walk out in everything that is honest, real, and beautiful about the way I was made and the way my heart moves.
It was there, in the FREEDOM that surrounds the Father’s heart that I found myself.
No pressure, no expectation, no ulterior motive, no doubt or lack of complete goodness and kindness towards me.
I’m still learning this. I’m still actively trading in my own expectation for freedom and learning to LET Holy Spirit renew my mind and shift my perspective. To open my eyes to a new dimension, a new way of thinking.
My heart just feels like it’s rushing over with hope renewed and thankfulness because I KNEW this day would come.
I heard you say to my heart, “There will be a day when you look back and say “it was SO worth it” and your heart will be glad.”
This is the day.
In this moment, no means of articulation could accurately do my heart justice.
These were the days that I came alive.
and their mouths were filled with laughter and their tongues with joyful singing. and we will sing among the nations, “the Lord has done great things”.
He really DOES work all things together for my good.
For MY good.
He is GOOD.